Christian Identity, Prayer, LGBTQ+, Hospitality, & Evangelism | Q&A With Rev. Christopher Gordon (Part 2)

Abide was blessed to have Rev. Christopher Gordon of the United Reformed Church speak at a 2024 Retreat at Zyphr Point, located on Lake Tahoe in Nevada where he covered passages from Daniel and Revelation. The theme of the retreat was “How to Live in the Last Days”. The following information is at times directly quoted or is a summary of the questions and answers. For all the videos from the weekend, click here for the full playlist on YouTube, including the five sessions, along with the question and answer session. 

Q: What might you say to a truly born-again believer who is struggling with accepting their Christian identity in Christ because of an unhealthy, hyper-perception of guilt and shame? 

A: Sin is discouraging, depressing, alienating, and makes you feel like a failure. What we tend to do is read back into our sanctification the act of justification. In other words, we call into question justification in light of our failure. That’s where I think we need to help people. You may be discouraged and struggling with sin, guilt, and a sense of shame. Throughout Scripture, the saints struggled with that. David fell into sin. Paul struggled with sin in Romans 7. First John says, “If anyone sins, we have an Advocate.” God has made a way for that situation. But that’s the life of sanctification, which is up and down—it doesn’t call into question one’s justification. If you have been declared righteous and are in Christ, you are forgiven once and for all. There’s no more condemnation (Romans 8:1). Positionally, you’ve changed. You’ve been brought into union with Jesus, and you’re not falling out of that due to your sense of shame. That’s why First John says, “If our own heart condemns us, God is greater than our heart and knows all things.” Your heart—your sense of shame—doesn’t determine the reality of your status before God.

Q: Is this because our “factory setting” is to think we need to pull ourselves up by our bootstraps, especially as Americans?

A: I think works-mentality is built into us. But for the sincere Christian who’s really struggling with guilt and shame, they’re just disgusted that they so easily sin. They’re thinking, “How could I be a Christian and still continue to do this stupid thing? It doesn’t make sense to me.” That’s a real struggle for a Christian. I don’t think they’re thinking, “If I just do enough good works…” I think that sense of guilt and shame exposes confusion—“Why am I still not gaining the victory I think I should have?” Part of that is just the reality of sanctification. The more sensitive you are as a Christian in your growth, the more you’re going to see sin in your life and patterns of sin. The Canons of Dort talk about this: God has to break patterns of sin in our lives. That doesn’t always happen right away. It can take years, while you’re repenting and coming back to the throne of grace, needing His help constantly. But it’s that confusion that makes guilt. The person you’re talking about isn’t like the Pharisee saying, “I fast twice a week, I give all that I possess, and therefore God is pleased with me.” That’s different from what you’re describing.

Q: What are some practical tips to grow in prayer?

A: You have to be realistic about prayer and discipline. Prayer should be a constant communion in your life—not just a programmed thing. In our Reformed world, we tend to over-program everything. Instead, learn to talk to the Lord in all circumstances. Talk to Him while driving, when you see someone who needs prayer—just make it a way of life. Part of our problem with prayer is that it’s hard to get off the ground with it because we’re often bringing burdens first, rather than coming as the Lord taught us, which is to praise Him first. For example, an old Vietnamese man once told us, “You Westerners gotta stop. You’ve got to warm up that heart.” He recommended reading a Psalm or singing before praying. That way, you prepare your heart and enjoy prayer rather than just unloading burdens right away.

Q: What recommendations do you have for creating a prayer habit or mindset?

A: Have a scheduled time for prayer, but also remember it’s open anytime—you can pray whenever you feel the need to talk to God. It’s a 24/7 open line. Discipline is key. You also need accountability. Praying with brothers and sisters, in groups, or with your spouse can be challenging but helpful. Prayer is the greatest discipline of the Christian life—it’s hard, but essential. Older saints who’ve been through much often become prayer warriors. Their prayers come from a deep heart of love for the Lord, and that kind of growth takes time and effort.

Q: How should we as young adult Christians handle situations with family, friends, or loved ones who identify as LGBTQ+?

A: You might have seen the story where a pastor advised a grandmother to attend a gay wedding. I thought that was terrible advice. Christopher Yuan and Rosaria Butterfield, who both lived that lifestyle, would never give such advice. Rosaria told me the modern church might not have helped her today because no one speaks clearly and directly about this issue anymore. That doesn’t mean you’re a jerk—you love the person. Rosaria herself was won through the hospitality of a pastor who shared 500 meals with her while lovingly speaking the truth. The fear of being hated or disliked shouldn’t deter you. Your job as a Christian is to be a truth-teller and leave the results to God. For example, I had an aunt living with a man before marriage who asked me to officiate their wedding. I couldn’t in good conscience, so I wrote her a loving letter explaining why. To my surprise, she repented, separated before the wedding, joined a church, and they did everything the right way. Don’t underestimate the power of speaking the truth in love.

Q: How important is hospitality in reaching non-believers?

A: Hospitality is huge. First Corinthians 5 says not to eat with someone who claims to be a Christian but lives in open rebellion. But with non-believers, Paul encourages us to have meals with them. Rosaria Butterfield’s book The Gospel Comes with a House Key explains this well. She opens her home to everyone, including drug-addicted neighbors, though with wisdom. The people you’re trying to reach are often right in front of you. Invest in their lives.

Q: Any advice for being hospitable when you have a believer over and want to share the gospel without coming across as preachy?

A: Get over it and just start preaching. That’s what you’ve got to do. People don’t want to be preached at—that’s our culture—but today people also need to be loved. We’re not in the era where you can leave a tract on a window and think that’s enough. You have to invest in people’s lives. Build a relationship with them. That opens the door to conversations about the gospel.

Q: Why don’t we see signs, visions, and miracles today like we see in the Bible?

A: Jesus addressed this when people kept asking for signs. He said, “No sign will be given to you except the resurrection.” That’s the ultimate sign. People in the Bible didn’t always believe because of miracles, either. Jesus fed the 5,000, and they still wanted to kill Him. The rich man and Lazarus parable makes the point too—if they don’t believe Moses and the prophets, they won’t believe even if someone rises from the dead. Today, God calls us to live by faith. He has given us sacraments, the visible word, but we’re always wanting something more miraculous. We need to trust the signs He has already provided.

Q: If you haven’t developed a comfortable relationship with your pastor and feel you can’t bring concerns to them, is that a sign you should move to a new church for spiritual growth?

A: That’s a good question. Pastors are in different stages of life, and they may feel stretched. If your pastor faithfully preaches the Word and prays for you, you are being fed spiritually—even if you don’t have a deep personal relationship with them. Some pastors are great preachers but not the best at visiting, and vice versa. Appreciate your pastor for their labor in the Word and recognize that your ultimate shepherd is Jesus. However, if your pastor is not approachable at all or you feel spiritually stagnant, you may need to seek counsel or consider another church.

Q: What are practical ways to encourage Christians to stay on fire for their faith and avoid lukewarmness?

A: Use the means of grace—attend church, participate in gospel fellowship, pray, and stay immersed in Scripture. Isolation leads to drifting. Hebrews warns us about drifting—it’s like a boat that slowly moves away from the dock. Christianity is communal. God didn’t save us to be lone rangers; He saved us into a body. Fellowship with believers is exhilarating and essential for spiritual growth. When I was converted, the fellowship I had in my church helped me grow immensely. Surround yourself with godly people who will encourage you and keep you accountable.

Q: What should Christians do to prepare for increasing cultural pressures against biblical truth?

A: We’re entering an age where you can’t sit on the fence anymore. You’ll have to stand firm in your convictions and be ready for opposition. Stay rooted in Scripture, lean on gospel fellowship, and trust in God’s sovereignty. This isn’t the time for lukewarm faith—it’s the time to boldly proclaim Christ and live faithfully, no matter the cost. God will sustain His people, even in the hardest circumstances.